Well I'm finally doing it...Something I never had the guts to try...I'm going to college!! I got my first text book today!
I'm just taking my core classes right now and will eventually earn a Special Education degree!...which I plan use to teach Deaf Education!
Keep fingers and toes crossed cuz it may be a BUMPY ride! :-)
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My Dad died in 2001...October to be exact and he had been diagnosed with lung cancer in July. we had a very short few months to settle our differences (and there were many) and say goodbye.
My Dad and I never had gotten close. He wasn't in my life until I was thirteen and by that time he had a new young wife and they began making their own family together. As much as I loved my baby brother...I was jealous. To be fair it wasn't all his fault...My grandmother did a very good job of keeping us apart. She was so worried that her lies and manipulations would come out that she worked extremely hard to cause division between us. So we developed more of a Neice - Uncle relationship. Things happen for a reason though and about a year before he died things began to fall into place.
My dad had never met his real father...he'd looked for him several times and came up with no answers. His mother..My Grandmother was very secretive about him. My dad knew his fathers name was Carl and believed his middle name was Elmer. A year or so before his death I began to look for my grandfather...I made a search and immediately came up with two names. I called the first one and asked to speak to Elmer Carl...Why I said Elmer instead of Carl I don't know...but I found out later that his name really was Elmer Carl...He said that he was Elmer Carl and I said...Did you ever live in Spokane Washington...His voice became excited and he said "Yes I did"....By now I was shaking...This was my GRANDFATHER! I said....You might want to sit down...because I think I am your grandaughter! This sweet 83 year old man began to cry..."Wait I said let's make sure...Were you married to Corinne Dawn?"...."Yes" he said choking back sobs....Yes I loved her very much you know...how is she?" I had to tell him that his first bride had died in 1989....His reaction was as if he there were no hard feelings or that no time had passed between them...."Ohhhhh Nooooooo...Oh noooooooo.." and he cried again.
We talked and I finally heard the story from his side...He said that he came home from the war wounded...He was in the hospital and My grandmother said she needed money for the babay (My Dad who was three I think.) He gave her 50.00 and he never saw her or my Dad again. My grandmother ran off with another military man and left no forwarding address. When he was released from the hospital he went to his inlaws only to be told that they were gone and that they were not going to tell him where they went...He said he was devestated and has never gotten over it. He married again but never had anymore children and he never stopped thinking about my Grandmother and my Dad.
Here is my Dad around the time he was taken away...
This was a completely different story than My Dad and I were told...We were told he ran around with other women and deserted my grandmother...Sigh.Well of course I put my dad and my grand-dad in touch...and they quickly made plans to meet. I wasn't able to go..but my sister and my dad drove from Washington state down to Texas to visit me and then to California to see my grandfather...This is the first and last time they would meet. Grandpa Carl died a few months later and My dad died a few months after that. I never met Grandpa Carl but spoke with him by phone a few times...
Anyway....All of that to say that although Dad's make mistakes...and some Dad's break our hearts....They are human and circumstances and poor choices can screw things up...But I truly believe that many Dad's out there that have screwed up regret it...Even wish that they could change things....This photo was taken the year my dad came back into my life when I was thirteen.
Here I am on our first family vacation to Disney land....I was thirteen maybe fourteen...It was the first and last trip we took together.
After my Dad was diagnosed he was pretty sure he wasn't going to make it...He wasn't able to communicate with me very well when it came to emotional issues...both of us were raised by the same cold, stern woman...so we lacked the skills to be painfully honest with each other....So my dad sent my Uncle John to do it...Bless his heart. My Uncle John called me one day to tell me that my dad wanted me to know he was sorry...and that he wanted to make sure that I knew he loved me. And I had to relay back to my Dad thru my Uncle that I had forgiven him years ago and that I KNEW he loved me and that I loved him too....How pathetic was that....But the message was given and recived. Mission acomplished.
This is a photo of my Dad right before he was diagnosed with Lung Cancer...he had stopped smoking a year earlier...
The last gift I got from my dad was the sound of his voice....I had been called by hospice and told that if I wanted to see my Dad alive I needed to get home immediately. I had already booked tickets and was supposed to leave in a day or two...but I needed to go NOW. Of course panic set in and I was scared of loosing him before I could say goodbye...I remember saying into the phone as calmly as i could..."Hang on Dad I'm on my way!" He didn't respond.
The next morning I flew out...I called my family again to tell them I was on my way. I asked my sister if I could talk to my dad. Tiffany told me that my Dad was in a coma and hadn't spoken for a few days but that she would hold the phone up to his ear. I said "I'm coming Dad don't worry I'll get there"....and I heard him whisper "hurry honey" and when I told him I loved him he said "I love you too". My sister was amazed and over the moon! "Laurie he hasn't spoken in DAYS!! I can't believe it!"....
I made it in time...In fact I made it with three days to spare. My dad passed away in his sleep peacfully three days after I arrived. The words he spoke on the phone were his last to me....And after years of feeling abandoned and rejected....My dad had made up for it all...:-)
Thank you Daddy....Happy Fathers Day!
Laurie
Here are a couple of my favorite pictures of my Dad...The first is kind of a mystery. I'm not sure who took it or why...but the expression on his face means he is not happy with someone! LOL...This is what we call "The Look" at my house and according to my kids I have one too! LOL
This one was taken by my step mom I believe....I just think it's so sweet...The little guy is my half brother.
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Hi!
Okay so I have this semi-new lense that I haven't played with too much. It's actually an extention for another lense. It's called an HD macro extention. It's strange to use because I have to stay far away from my subject or it wont focus..so my attempts to take macro shots seemed impossible. HOWEVER once I pulled them up on the computer I saw that I could crop them and zoom in to get the desired detail I was hoping for. Here are some examples.
So...Here's my question..I've tried to read about it and it still escapes me! I shot in RAW format...I cropped in Raw rather than after converting to JPG. I then saved them as JPGS. When I opened them they were TINY file sizes. Way too small to be able to print to a lager size like I wanted to. So I changed the constraints and blew them up to the sizes I wanted in Photoshop. Some are 8x10 with 240 dpi. Will these print as I see them here or will the quality be crap? ANYONE know how to do this correctly? If so would you mind explaining it to me??
THANKS!
Laurie
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Before the near death experience with the gator...I did enjoy shooting some awesome wild life!
Bird First Gator Second Gator Cute Raccoon Cool Bird
As you can see there were gators a- plenty....but there were other beautiful creatures as well!
third gator
fourth gator
The fifth gator and the gator that tried to eat me! (Okay that might be a little dramatic...but she doesn't look too happy with me does she!)
And one of the best reasons of all to go back again!
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Summer is here and I finally have time to spend doing what I LOVE...So yesterday I went to Brazos Bend National Park to take some nature shots with my friend Ann Marie. As I drove in I noticed there were warning signs everywhere about alligators and how we shoudn't feed them..touch them...get within thirty feet of them...ect. Well that didn't seem to be a problem for most of the day...I saw gators here and there but they were at a distance and in the water. They seemed no more interested in socializing with me as I was with them...BUT on the last trail I chose to hike around I noticed the birds were really making a lot of noise,squawking and flapping their wings. It had been so quite just a bit before that so I started looking around to see what was going on. WAYYYYYYY ahead I saw what looked like a black garbage bag on the bank of the lake. So I did what any one would do and I continued my hike...(I was almost to the end and to have turned back would have added another hour to the hike.) As my friend and I got closer we realized it wasn't a trash bag or a bronze statue like we thought...It was a gator!
Yup that's Ann Marie posing with the "bronze statue" or "trash bag"!....But wait...it's mouth opened!
HOLY CRAP!! Hmmmmm well it doesn't look that big really...does it? And look she's smiling that's a good sign isn't it??
So we hung around and snapped a few more pics of her...Since she seemed friendly enough....
GULP!! We decided that we might have overstayed our welcome....As we began to discuss wheather we should turn around and go back the other direction or find a quite spot and wait for her to leave...SHE MOVED! (The first two shots of this happening were too blurry to post due to the fact that my ass was in "FLEE" mode and my hands were shaking!)
There was water where she crossed into but we didn't hear any sound that resembled a HUGE alligator entering the water...So now we really had some decisions to make. Walk on...since she was gone. (We hoped) turn back and add more time to our hike. The latter would seem the best choice but we had been in the heat all day and were exhausted! So we did what anyone would do....WE WALKED ON! I went first and shot some photos as I walked hoping to catch the gator in the water...NOT hiding in the woods licking her chops!
Looks as if she was bored and not in the mood for sweaty blonde women
with cameras!
WHAT A GREAT DAY!! :-)
]]>What did you do for fun when you were a kid? How is it different from what you see kids doing now?
Submitted by jaklumen.
I was raised alone by my Grandmother..So I did a lot of things alone or with my cousin Jessica! Here are a few..
1. I played with my dolls Gerorge, Marsha and April until I was 12 (Hey! I was an only child!!)
2. I liked Legos and had a set that made a cool windmill
3. My best friend Jamie and I used to spend hours role playing.
4. I fell in love with Shaun Cassidy and I spent a lot of time in a bean bag chair with headphones and Shaun on the phonograph with visions of romance dancing in my head!
5. Jessica and I used to play board games but she cheated! LOL
6. Scavenger hunts.... I loved them! Jessica and I would write instructions on scraps of paper and we would send each other around the house reading the messages until we arrived at some silly prize at the end!
7. The lilac dance! Along the side of our house there was a wall of lilac bushes..GORGEOUS lavendar bushes that were taller than I was. I would walk on the sidewalk that was below the wall and if there was a breeze the tiny flowers would fall at my feet and all around me like snow! I would imagine that it was my wedding day...and walk down the cobblestone sidewalk like a bride! (Yeah I was CORNEY!!)
8. I made UFOS out of leaves...
I'm thinking that kids today would think I was a STRANGE kiddo! LOL
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I am off to see my "secret crush"...Robert Downey Jr. in...... IRON MAN!!
My heart is fluttering! :-)
Laurie
]]>I am off to see my "secret crush"...Robert Downey Jr. in...... IRON MAN!!
My heart is fluttering! :-)
Laurie
]]>I received an e-mail from Marvin Fletcher today. The subject line said
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"I am a special girl who know how to make pleasure for your sole and body" Dear Marvin Fletcher, I don't know who you are but you are a SICK FUCK! You have gender identity issues and a very slippery grasp of the English language. My "sole" will be just fine without your help and so will my soul! Marvin, it makes no difference to me if you are a special girl or a middle aged freakazoid (My personal opinion is the latter) but just for future reference...if you can't form a complete sentence articulately ....you aren't much of a turn on and anything you might be selling for my body and "Sole" is not going to impress me. In closing may I make a suggestion?? There is a nice young man in Nigeria. I believe he comes from a Royal family...He needs someone to hang on to some money for him...If you send him an e-mail I'm SURE he will be so relieved to have such an honest friend handle this for him that he will reward you nicely! Sincerely |
I am a die hard Robert Downey Jr. fan and I just want to say to him..on the off chance that hangs around Vox.
I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT AND I AM SO PROUD OF YOU!!!!!
I haven't seen Ironman yet...and the ONLY reason I would even consider seeing it is because he in it. However I have been rooting for him and for his sobriety for years and I am absolutely thrilled that he has made a comeback!
Laurie
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